8 is Great!!

The Firstborn. What a hard job that must be! I am last born in my family, so I wouldn't know, but I sure am glad we have this Ethan boy as our firstborn child.  He is pretty awesome!  He sets a great example (most of the time;) and is compassionate and loving.  Our not-so-little man turned 8 on July 2 and we are looking forward to his baptism on the 20th of this month!

He still asks me to take pictures of him

He loves his dad A LOT and is a snuggler

He is a FISH and has always loved the pool. He swims very well independently now.  

He is a GREAT big brother.

Birthday morning

Cupcakes at Nana's on the 4th of july

He just looks old in this picture...how does this happen?

He loves Goldfish:)

Sibling Love

Ethan is so sweet with Cam.  The other day she reached out to grab his shirt and started chewing on it and i said, "don't let her chew your shirt!" and he said, " i don't want to make her sad mom!" then she grabbed his shorts:)

He is a fast reader, he has a quick mind, and his memory is crazy good!!!  We just love him tons and are so blessed to have him in our family!!!

Bags

bags might be one of my favorite things to sew. they are useful which is a big plus for me. i try to always make useful things! and you can make them relatively quickly, and there are so many fun options!

these are Martha Stewart dish towels from a few years ago, that i have been holding onto...and i finally decided to use them for this project! these two were for mother's day recipients.

i love this fox. i am really loving foxes right now.  i saw the image here and was able to make my own little guy:)  so cute! i made three of these bags

and i made three of these bags too, one for mother's day and 2 for teacher appreciation. (obviously i didn't get pictures of the other two before i needed to give them, one was a purple R and i had another S in a medium blue color). inspiration here

the fox bags and stenciled initial bags were made out of drop cloth fabric that i had left over from my curtains and my first ottoman attempt.  the back of the dishtowel bags are also drop cloth material.  it didn't take long to make these bags, i just did them in snatches of time....cutting them out one day, sewing straps another time i had a minute...sewing them together in another 15 minute snatch of time i had...that's how projects go lately.   whenever i have a little bit of time i work on a project for a few minutes and then baby needs me or kids need food, or to be read to, so then i leave it for a while...and come back to it later:)  right now i have binky leashes and reusable snack bags cut out...waiting for their snatches of time to get worked on:)  it's important for me to figure out when i can work on things, even for just a few minutes :)  keeps me sane.

i have one or two more pillows for my couch that i want to finish...i'll keep snatching those minutes:)

Camryn is 6 months old!

holy cow!! 6 months flies by huh?

happy girl

this is a girl who definitely has brothers...culprit this time was blake

cute girl, she loves to have her fingers in her mouth

on may 9th Camryn started eating some rice cereal

she loves it!

maybe a little too much! we had to cut back on the rice cereal because she's having some nursing issues now...or maybe that's because of her reflux, MAN i wish she could just TELL me what is going on you know?

Avery graduated from preschool! she had such a fun year with Mrs. Newitt.  she is SOOOO excited to go to kindergarten! very excited!

we were at Nana Kay and Papa Jerry's house in Surprise, and the kids had been swimming...we decided to forgo formal naps that day but Blake persevered and slept on this chair:)

she loves to chew on her blanket, like really loves it!

Kendall has taken to calling Cam "ginger" because her hair is staying reddish...then Ethan suggested calling her "ginger newt" funny boys!

this was on her 6 month birthday:)  she has sweet little chunky legs, i love this girl so much! she is giving us a little run for our money right now, but she is such a blessing and a love! her smile is amazing and brightens up our lives so much! she is amazing!!!

Third Time's a Charm!

alright friends, total disclosure right?  Remember when i made my ottoman for my really pregnant self so i could put my feet up?  well in case you don't or don't want to click, i stenciled a drop cloth and wasn't super exact when i was cutting it to be stapled because i thought, no one is going to see those edges right?

well i didn't finish the edges and the above picture is what the end result of my haste and not finishing the edges was...hanging threads, really really ugly!

then Blake took a sharpie to it in multiple places.  and i hadn't glued the foam down to the table so it was shifty too...bad karma!  so i took off that cover, got some strong spray adhesive and glued that foam down...worked like a charm!

Then i recovered it in a tiny orange stripe that i got from Home Fabrics for $3 a yd. Score!!!  i cut precisely this time and finished the edges and i was super pleased with it.  

but of course, Camryn spit up on it on like day 3 of life, (i had recovered it about a week before she was born:)) cause i laid her on it to change a diaper. then we spilled gripe water on it a few times...it wasn't looking too good...

i knew when i was first deciding to make one that something impervious to liquid would be best, but i didn't want to do a fabric then cover it with vinyl, too much thickness and i didn't want to mess with the two layers, and a faux leather i found at Home Fabrics was pretty but expensive and too dark for the room, with such a dark couch.

so i decided to get this laminated cotton from Joann's (when i THOUGHT i had 50% off coupon, turns out it was $1 off on sale so i couldn't use my coupon, grrrr...i had made a special trip to get it too and didn't find out about the $1 off until after it was already cut, lame! i digress...)

and i LOVE it!!! didn't take long to change out, totally is holding up well and any spills just get wiped right off...

bonus is it is bright and light and lovely.  and it feels fine when i put my feet up on it, i was afraid it would have a sticking effect when your legs rested on it for a while, but it doesn't, it's great.

so now i am recovering all our pillows to be brighter/lighter in response to the ottoman change.  mother's day/teacher appreciation projects interrupted my pillow sewing but i will post both of those groups of projects soon:)  

yeah for learning something every time i do, and redo, a project:):)

18 months

this month (on the 11th) we passed the 18 month marker of Christian's passing.  This month he would be 20 months old and Camryn turned 5 months old, both on the 18th.  I have a lot of feelings that almost seem contradictory in nature...i am so happy we have Camryn, she has a smile that takes up her whole face, I love it when she burrows into my neck.  I love her little giggle she is learning to give when she finds something funny. I like catching her eye when she's in her swing or sitting with someone else and knowing that when I say, "hi beautiful girl" she will almost always smile at me. I love those things and so much more.

But at the same time, I am sad that Christian isn't here. Everyday, part of my brain is sad about that.  I feel his absence, at the same time as I count him in my mind as I count the kids at the park, as I make pb & j for lunches, and wonder if he would have liked jelly or honey better.  Sometimes on a particularly hard day with the kids, I think longingly of the one more I don't have with me.  And that helps put things in perspective, because as hard as that day was with the four that are here with us, I would do the same day in an instant with the 5 we truly have.  I wish we could know what his laugh sounds like, what his favorite foods are, have pictures of him rolling over and walking and have videos of his first words.  I was sad when I made the list for the incoming 18 month old children in nursery at church, because I knew that the month of February, instead of having no incoming children, should have had Christian...

I don't have those things.  I will not know the answers to those questions here on earth.  And my heart is broken because of that.  But at the same time, I have so much joy from Ethan and Avery and Blake and Camryn and I have joy because of Christian.  I love that he was here, that I knew him and served him here, albeit a small portion of time, but that has made all the difference.

Having Camryn so close to Christian has been hard emotionally and mentally, not to mention physically but I know in my heart that it was the right choice for our family.  As hard as having a new person is, she is also helping us heal, by being her baby self and letting us love on her all the time.  She is amazingly patient with all the love and kisses and hugs and siblings trying to get her to laugh...she is what we all need.  She is in no way taking Christian's place, you can't replace a child.  But I firmly believe we are born in the order we are in our families for a reason.  I have seen it in my own family of origin, and I see it our family, with our children.  Ethan would never have survived as anything but a firstborn and Avery was born to be Ethan's little sister and Blake's big sister, she gets along with both of them well and bridges the gap between the boys.  Similarly, Christian was born to bring our family closer through his time here and then through his passing away. I am not saying I know WHY he could not stay with us, because I don't, but I see the ramifications of his absence.  We can be stronger together, having gone through the hard experience of saying goodbye to our fourth child.  We can be stronger and better so that we can be with him again, one day.  We will live for that goal.  And Camryn, coming as she did on Christian's heels, is helping us knit ourselves back together.  Families are amazing and I find myself intensely grateful that I have been entrusted with these amazing small people, who are small physically but so big in spirit.  I looked over at Ethan the other night, as I was feeding Camryn and Ethan was having quiet reading time before bed, and I thought, he is so awesome, how fortunate I am to be his mother! I get to call them mine and my heart is full.

Easter Kids

oh these kids...they are so cute!!!  this was Easter Sunday, the obligatory "all dressed up for church" picture, but really i think it came out pretty well! especially considering i was lame and went shopping for Avery's dress the Saturday before, in a 45 minute time window...but whew! we found one she and i agreed one and it went well with ms. cam's purple number she had been given before she was born so yahoo!

we had the traditional ward egg hunt on Good Friday, here is Camryn during the egg hunt...patient girl:)

it seems to be a thing for kids his age to put the bucket on the head...go figure huh?

nice face Blake.

that is only slightly better Blake and Ethan's smile looks a little painful, but i am thinking these are the memories we cherish you know?

Blake during the egg hunt...he kept taking eggs out of his bucket and saying,"hmmm...let's see what's in THIS one!" and then he would get all excited, "wow! candy!" or "wow, a plastic bunny!" it's the small things people!

Ethan checking his haul

this week, i got my hair cut, finally! sheesh, it had been almost 18 months.

i'm gonna donate it.  there were about 11 inches for those that wanted to know:)

this girl has us all wrapped around her tiny pinkie...and is it hard to see why? man, when she wants to be charming, she is SO CUTE! and even when she doesn't want to be charming and cries, Avery finds it hilarious! go figure. sisters!

so sweet:)

and then Blake wanted in on the action (photobomber)

and then this is what i get when i ask him to smile...cheeseball

Kendall entertaining Camryn with her own tent...now the kids try to make "her own tent" for her multiple times a day...slightly dangerous  but fun:)

Blake got given a George (curious  that is) by our sweet neighbors. he insisted that George wanted a sandwich for lunch and he should have his own chair. i made sure to tell Blake that he couldn't really feed George, so he (Blake) would have to do the eating. He politely obliged.  He carried George around and took a nap with him that day, very sweet.

Here comes Peter Cottontail...

(oval embroidery hoop, tulle tied on the same as here, and a little picket fence bunny:)

hopping down the bunny trail...sooner than ever! Easter just snuck right up on us!!!  I had my St. Patrick's Day decorations down and Easter up promptly after the 17th, but I'm just showing you now:)  I had a lot of fun decorating for Easter.  I love the springy colors!!!

my ever changing shelf...

subway Easter art we did last year, the eggs you see there are MDF, the brain-child of Audrey, after she saw them on a Groopdealz one day and we decided to see if we could cobble together materials to make them ourselves.  Big thanks to Michelle for donating the MDF and our other friend Sam for cutting them!

the eggs before being decorated:)

my picket fence bunnies were inspired by these...i had white bunnies so i decided to paint the sticks instead of leaving them natural. i had the eggs to make the banner i linked to...but i liked the bunnies better and i ran out of room to put things:)

the jars are painted on the inside, i poured paint in the bottom, maybe 1-2 inches and then turned the jar upside down on a paper plate to let it drain out. it's pretty cool to watch. there will be spots where the paint won't be uniform, i just took a foam brush and gently evened it out, and you really can't tell:)  more eggs, more bunnies...the printed subway art is from eighteen25 they have lots of different ones for different seasons/holidays and i really like them:)  i always print mine 8x10 from Costco and they come out beautifully.

another shot of the picket fence garland....

close up of bunny jars

close up of eggs,cause i love the bling on the little one:)

so we are ready for Easter! and frankly, i like the decorations so much, they may stay up for the majority of April, since Easter got a little short changed being in the same month as St. Patrick's Day:)